Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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