I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Terrible idea I love it
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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