when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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