i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
