It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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