But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
