My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
