I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Randomize
