his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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