Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.