i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
