while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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