It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Your penis caused this!
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
