his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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