Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
