Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
