Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Is it because I queefed?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
