I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
