I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
My pussy is not your playground.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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