I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
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