god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
