So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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