He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Randomize