needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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