Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize