I want to stick my p in your. b.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Randomize
