this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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