:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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