Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
