the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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