I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Randomize
