I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize