I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
My dick has a subreddit
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Randomize
