When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
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