I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
