Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
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