You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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