what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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