I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Randomize
