You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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