a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
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