He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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