have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
