Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Randomize
