UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
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