I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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