everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
