i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
