dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
