I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Randomize
